Volume 2, Chapter 7

It is Friday afternoon and I am meeting Suu Maung at the cafeteria for a cup of coffee. They make pretty good coffee here and I know it won’t be crowded at this time of day. I see her and wave her over. I order a flat white, a typical Kiwi choice, and she has a short black. I study her as our coffees are being made. She is more quietly dressed today, again in a long skirt, grey this time, and a loose, pale blue shirt. We have a corner table, out of the way, and we start chatting. My task is simply to get to know her and win her trust but I am genuinely curious about her. She has great poise and is quietly elegant.

“Were you happy with the panel discussion on Wednesday?” I ask.

“It wasn’t my idea but they needed a woman from the department and I agreed to do it. I have already learned that as a woman in accounting I will be expected to do more than my fair share of committee and other service roles. It is also good for students to see other women from the profession.”

“It shouldn’t be necessary in the twenty-first century to prove to students that women can work in Accounting,” I suggest.

“I agree.” she replies. “But some of my students don’t seem to have a proper professional focus and may need that explained.”

“What do you think of the question about sexual harassment?”

“You were right,” she replies. “It’s a serious problem in many areas but it shouldn’t discourage women from joining the Accountancy profession. I don’t remember the questioner from any Accountancy courses. Do you know her from gender studies?”

“No, I didn’t recognise her but she could be one of ours. I didn’t teach in the second semester.”

“Do you have a background in Accounting?”

“Almost none. I am interested in women breaking into different areas of professional and public life. Right now I am engaged in a comparative study of women in politics in Finland, the USA, and New Zealand. I happened to see the notice of your panel discussion and I was curious.”

We talk about our countries of origin, about our different experiences in the USA and also our impressions of Auckland and, in particular, of the University of South Auckland. Suu seems to find the institution even quirkier than I do. She says she doesn’t think she will stay very long but is happy enough for the moment.

We seem to be getting along well for our first proper meeting. I have my own motivation for making a connection but she also seems keen to connect. I explain my living arrangement with Mikaere. Suu lives alone in a one bedroom apartment in a small modern apartment block. She talks in a vague way of making me some Burmese food at some time. I confess that I am no cook. We part, vowing to keep in touch. As I leave I get a call from Matilda. She wants to see me now. I say I am just returning to my office. She says she doesn’t want to come to campus and can she meet me at my house. I hesitate but I do agree and say I can be home at 5 pm. I am spending far too much time and energy on all of this but I can’t stop now.

As I get home I happen to look at my ‘special’ phone used for communicating with Maria. There is a missed call so I call back immediately. She says she is comin up to Auckland next week, on Wednesday. I tell her I have just been having coffee with Suu Maung. She seems slightly surprised but pleased … I think. She says she wants me to meet Merrick, as soon as I can. She tells me she will let me know where she is staying and we should meet up on Wednesday evening, if possible. There is a knock on the door and I say I have to go. We were basically finished anyway.

Matilda is a little early. Her face looks drawn. I think she has lost weight even though she was always very slim. Her jeans hang loosely about her. She somehow manages a smile, though it appears forced. I ask her to sit in the living room and offer her a glass of wine, which she accepts. I need to rummage to find anything to nibble on, eventually finding some raw almonds. Matilda takes a slurp of wine and sets upon the almonds. She clearly has not been looking after herself. I fear this could be a rerun of Jason’s first meeting with me, with lots of emotion and few words, so I try to be empathetic.

“I do know the basic facts about what happened and I think I have some idea what you must be feeling. You can share with me anything you want to. I am not going to judge you.”

“Oh Inka, I feel so guilty and stupid and worthless and ridiculous.”

Clearly this won’t go the same way as Jason’s meeting after all.

“I don’t know what I thought I was doing, seducing McDuff like that. I felt so frustrated and trapped with Jason and it seemed to make sense at the time.”

Matilda then bursts into tears. After a moment’s hesitation I go over to her and give her a big hug. She calms down after a little while and I return to my seat. I try to bring the conversation onto a more practical level.

“Did you complete all your courses for the year?”

“Yes, I was very lucky. By the time it all blew up I had just completed all my assessments. I wouldn’t have been able to do anything after that.”

“Good,” I say. “Now, let’s think about what practical things you need to do. I am guessing it's all over between you and Jason?”

“Oh yes. I wanted out before and I don’t think I can ever forgive him for making that complaint even though I was the truly guilty one.”

“OK. You will have to speak to him eventually, and it would be good not to leave it too long. What about McDuff? Do you think you are up to talking to him?”

Matilda hesitates. “I doubt he ever wants to see me again.”

“I wouldn’t assume that,” I respond.

This swings Matilda to the opposite end of the spectrum. “Maybe I should move in with him and look after him, if he would have me.”

“I really think you should take a deep breath and think carefully about your next moves. You might decide to offer him an apology, not that he wasn’t responsible for his own actions. He could have just said, ‘No’.”

Matilda seems to take that advice on board. I am hungry and Matilda must be too.

“I think I should take you out for an Indian meal. Having some food in you will help you think straight.”